Who are you at your worst when hurt by your partner, overwhelmed, and defensive? Do you get high and mighty, or do you retreat into a shell? Do you blow things up, or do you melt down? Use the grids below to identify your losing strategies. *Adapted from Terry Real's Relationship Grid These 5 Losing Strategies lead to relational turmoil. The 5 [...]
Every relationship is built on agreements. Some are created with consideration, and some form over time unconsciously. Healthy relationship agreements function to clarify values, to offer care and protection, and to create shared reality together. Here are ten agreements healthy partners choose to live by, because they are proven to create a happy and drama free life together. Download PDF of Agreements [...]
A core challenge in relationships is how to be both deeply generous with your partner while simultaneously being your own fierce self-advocate. Even the healthiest couples have the age old fight about whose needs are more important. And nobody likes to fight, but... The reality is that creating a life with another human is infinitely challenging and that there's no [...]
The hard stuff is facing difficult emotions. Sometimes it takes heroic efforts to digest emotional experiences rather than avoid them. A balanced spiritual path includes and integrates emotional reality. But sometimes spiritual tools themselves can be used to control and dismiss painful emotions in ourselves and others. This is referred to as spiritual bypass. Spiritual bypass is the use of [...]
The path to inner peace is not comfortable. It requires us to traverse through our psychological defenses, our emotional world, and our relationships. These layers often hold pain and fear so we avoid facing them. Willingness and support make it possible to negotiate each layer and connect with our spiritual core of inner peace. The path through these layers follows as such: [...]
Parenting is emotional edge work, and each phase of child development presents unique emotional challenges to the parent. Emotional edge work is the practice of willingly and compassionately facing the emotional pain of life. As a new Dad, I’m knee deep in opportunities to work my own edge.
There is so much to consider when creating a satisfying therapy experience. Some clients have the best of intentions when getting started with therapy, but find themselves feeling stuck and discouraged about what to talk about and how to get the most out of the process. Here are some guidelines ...